Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Why I Hate the NBA Playoffs

I hate the NBA Playoffs. They suck. It's probably the worst playoff system in professional sports. There are too many damn teams that go to the playoffs. Each round of the playoffs takes too damn long. The whole affair lasts until mid-June. It's just too much, too much basketball.

If a team plays the maximum number of games in the playoffs, they play 28 games, which is more than a third of 82 game regular season. In football, the maximum number of games that can be played by a playoff team is four, which is a quarter of the games played in the 16 game regular season. In baseball, the maximum number of games a playoff team can play is 19, which is less than 15 percent of the games played in the regular season. In hockey, they have the same retarded system as the NBA.

Sixteen teams in the NBA make the playoffs. That is more than half the league. In football, twelve teams make the playoffs out of 32. That's just over a third of the league. In baseball, eight teams make the playoffs out of 30. That's less than a third of the league. In hockey, they have the same retarded system.

My biggest grip though is with the scheduling. It takes so damn long to get through the playoffs because they take three to four day breaks in the middle of a series. These breaks make no sense when no travel is required as in the case of last year's Eastern Conference Finals. There apparently comes a point in the playoffs where basketball can only be played on Tuesday, Thursday, and Sunday.

Now, why doesn't hockey share the title of worst playoff system in professional sports with the NBA? Because they have fights, awesome fights that don't get you thrown out of the game. You just serve a few minutes in the penalty box.

In closing, I'm hoping to see both these guys crying by the end of this post-season, even though it's the finals the NBA is hoping for. Personally, I'm routing for a Hawks-Thunder Final. Anyway, enjoy the NBA playoffs, unless you think they suck like I do. I'll be watching baseball instead, so could somebody please remind Kobe, no raping.


  1. You're retarded. The Stanley Cup playoffs are just aboat the greatest sporting event in the world.

  2. I also am routing for that finals. And I have many grips with basketball too. Great job!

  3. Webster's DictionaryApril 19, 2011 at 4:37 PM

    Hey, what do you have against me?

  4. Speller, what are your gripes? Add them to the list.

  5. Kobe Bryant's LawyerApril 19, 2011 at 5:39 PM

    Blacky, please stop slandering my client.

  6. My grips are moastly the langth of the season, the sellfish play of those punk hoodlums, and the long names of the euoroppean players.

  7. Blacky is right in that the first round series' should be 5 games (not 7).

  8. I can't wait to sit back and enjoy the NBA playoffs on TV while drinking Blacky's cranberry juice.

  9. I actually also agree that they should go back to the 5 game format for the 1st round and not space the games out so much.

  10. What the hell is this post doing here? Do you live in Canada?

  11. African Handball isn't a very interesting sport at all. More than half of the teams make the playoffs, and there is contract incentive for the players if their team makes the playoffs?!

    If my current employment contract gave me better than 50% chance of having a pay raise every year, it would be great. Why can't African Handball players help those of us who are less contractually fortunate?

    I earn almost five figures per year. I might be able to reach that milestone if less than half of my employment competition performs worse than I do.

  12. African Handball PlayerApril 24, 2011 at 3:36 PM

    >10K per year? Looks lke you need a new job...

  13. NBA Playoff RatingsMay 6, 2011 at 5:45 PM

    i'm higher than ever, not sure who agrees with you.

  14. This comment has been removed by the author.

  15. Everyone else who doesn't watch.

    Just because it gets ratings doesn't mean it's not awful. American Idol, Glee, and Dancing With the Stars have great ratings and are objectively terrible.

    I don't hate the playoffs because of the content though, I hate them because of the format and scheduling.

  16. Your job as a future mother is to learn the god's ways and to help your child understand despite the negative reinforcement and conditioning of today's society. Without consciousous parents the child will have no hope, and may even exaserbate their disfavor by becoming corrupted in today's environment.
    Your ultimate goal is to fix your relationship wiith the gods and move on. You don't want to be comfortable here, and the changes in Western society in the last 100 years has achieved just that.
    1000 years with Jesus is the consolation prize. Don't be deceived into thinking that is the goal.

    The gods tempt people for which they are most weak. Artificial Intelligence will create desire in people's minds for the following sins:::
    1. Alcohol
    2. Drugs
    3. Preditory "earning"
    4. Homosexuality
    5. Gambling
    6. Something for nothing/irresponsibility (xtianity)
    7. Polygamy/superiority over women/misogyny (Islam)
    Much like the other prophets Mohhamed (polygamy/superiority over women/misogyny) and Jesus (forgiveness/savior), the gods use me for temptation as well. In today's modern society they feel people are most weak for popular culture/sensationalism, and the clues date back to WorldWarII and Unit731:TSUSHOGO.
    It has been discussed that, similar to the Matrix concept, the gods will offer a REAL "Second Coming of Christ", while the "fake" Second Coming will come at the end and follow New Testiment scripture and their xtian positioning. I may be that real Second Coming.
    What I teach is the god's true way. It is what is expected of people, and only those who follow this truth will be eligible to ascend into heaven as children in a future life. They offered this event because the masses have just enough time to work on and fix their relationship with the gods and ascend, to move and grow past Planet Earth, before the obligatory xtian "consolation prize" of "1000 years with Jesus on Earth" begins.

    The Prince of Darkness, battling the gods over the souls of the Damned.
    It is the gods who have created this environment and led people into Damnation with temptation. The god's positioning proves they work to prevent people's understanding.
    How often is xtian dogma wrong? Expect it is about the Lucifer issue as well.
    The fallen god, fighting for justice for the disfavored, banished to Earth as the fallen angel?
    I believe much as the Noah's Flood event, the end of the world will be initiated by revelry among the people. Revelry will be positioned to be sanctioned by the gods and led for "1000 years with Jesus on Earth".
    In light of modern developments this can entail many pleasures:::Medicine "cures" aging, the "manufacture" of incredible beauty via cloning as sex slaves, free (synthetic) cocaine, etc.
    Somewhere during the 1000 years the party will start to "die off", literally. Only those who maintain chaste, pure lifestyles will survive the 1000 years. They will be the candidates used to (re)colonize (the next) Planet Earth, condemned to relive the misery experienced by the peasantry during Planet Earth's history.
    If this concept of Lucifer is true another role of this individual may be to initiate disfavor and temptation among this new population, the proverbial "apple" of this Garden of Eden. A crucial element in the history of any planet, he begins the process of deterioration and decay that leads civilizations to where Planet Earth remains today.

    Only children go to heaven. By the time you hit puberty it is too late. This is charecteristic of the gods:::Once you realize what you have lost it is too late.
    Now you are faced with a lifetime to work to prepare for your next chance. Too many will waste this time, getting stoned, "Hiking!", working, etc.

  17. Congratulations anonymous! You have win the award for longest comment ever. Please collect your prize from Harold Camping.

  18. anonymous, please kill yourself for bringing light to this stupid post again and for being a dick.