Johnny Bagels is missing. It’s been five days since his last post. The PTU faithful are stoically staring silently at everyone’s favorite blog about all things Sports, Politics, New York, Unemployment and Lists awaiting a new blog entry from PTU’s most prolific contributor and administrator. I myself am beginning to worry.
Bagels is known for publishing a new blog entry almost every weekday. With no new entries on Friday and Monday, PTU readers were clamoring for fresh commentary on sports and cutting edge lists on Tuesday morning. With nothing new to sate their appetite for lists, PTU readers are beginning to demand answers. Questions swirl around Bagel's disappearance. Where might he be? What might have happened to him? Who is responsible? Does he have any unpublished material? This PTU contributor suspects foul play, but not necessarily murder. Potential suspects abound and unfortunately include some PTU contributors who may have become jealous of Bagel’s penchant for plentiful and powerful prose.
PTU hopes for Bagels safe return and asks anyone with information concerning his whereabouts or in possession of unpublished blog posts to please contact PTU immediately. Blog contributors are standing by. Bottle and Apple are also reported missing.