Thursday, June 16, 2011

A Serious Examination of Weiner

The media has predictably had a field day with the last name of Brooklyn and Queens councilman Anthony Weiner and his recent issues, and frankly it's just immature and lazy to look at a situation like that. The never ending jokes and silliness have kept most of us from really getting a grip on Weiner; you might even say the press has blocked us from the real Weiner. Sure, we had pictures in the paper that can be used as rock hard evidence, but would any Weiner pictures stand up in court? I doubt it. The fact that we're looking this closely at Weiner might mean that we are actually the ones with the problem. For 3 straight weeks, Weiner has been at the tip of the tongue of everyone in New York City.

Where does Weiner go from here? For years, democrats have stroked Weiner's ego; he was the next big thing in politics. Where do the Weiner lovers go from here for some satisfaction? It's a well known fact that councilwoman Christine Quinn does not like Weiner (for a few years in college she may have been a fan of Weiner but that soon changed), but there are so many big names who have fallen in love with Weiner. Alec Baldwin has been obsessed with Weiner getting off since this whole thing started. Weiner pulling out at the last minute right before the coming election has opened up many new possibilities though. Queens Councilman (his hometown, Queens, has always loved Weiner) John Liu has been ready to lick Weiner in the primaries since he first saw those underwear pictures. He's primed and ready to go, and now that there's a void in the political landscape, Liu could now find himself the next Weiner to fill that hole. It would have been a close race to the finish before the scandal, but Weiner had shown himself able to squeeze through tight openings in the past. Now that he has decided to step down though, I'm afraid New York city will be starved for Weiner. I might even say the mayoral race will suffer from the lack of Weiner and you may even see some people switch sides. Whoever fills his shoes though, shouldn't try to be what he was; he was great at what he did (while most Democrats shriveled at the sight of Republicans, Weiner stood up) but the people of New York can't take two Weiners at the same time, no matter how hard he tries to fit himself in.

We here at PTU don't want to come off as Weiner lovers though, far from it. Far, far, far from it. What he did was wrong, and Weiner deserves the shafting. Maybe now we can all be adults and stop looking at Weiner as an escape from the real problems in politics. We all wanted to look elsewhere rather than facing the real issues; the formerly larger than life Weiner came at just the right moment and now he's shrunk to half the size of his former self. The job of a city councilman is tough though and means a lot of responsibility; It may be a relief for Weiner to finally let go of his load. Whatever he chooses to do, let's all leave Weiner alone for a while and focus on the real issues, like the New York penal system that's sucking us dry financially. Let's move on, no matter how good it feels to beat on Weiner.


  1. Pulitzer Prize JudgeJune 16, 2011 at 1:29 PM

    Excellent Work, how much they paying you at this rag? I'll double your salary.

  2. Bagels, what's your e-mail address?

    I've got some pictures to send you ;)

  3. if you added a "the" before every mention of the word "Weiner" it would make for an even better read