Wednesday, June 8, 2011

PTU WNBA Preview

As we enter the dog days of summer, there's a faint ray of light that shines on the boring sports landscape every June: The WNBA! They got next! To prove that we're not actually Chauvinist pigs here at PTU let's give a little love to the lady hoopers. Let's preview the Eastern Conference, fellas!

Philadelphia Liberty Belles:
One of the 8 original WNBA teams and perennial powerhouse, the Liberty Belles are led by forward/center Shanelle Bourveiouisx (pronounced like it's spelled) who last season set an WNBA record with 15 straight triple doubles. The Belles are coached by former child actor Rick Shroeder who has done an admirable job.

Cleveland Unicorns:
The Unicorns dominated their division last year despite the mid season move from their local arena to a high school gym in nearby Dayton, Ohio. On the bright side, they had 10 sellouts in their final 20 games.

Boston Bedazzlers:
Jessica Pricely led a young Bedazzlers squad to a .500 record last season, even while recording a ska album under the moniker Janet Price and the Ponies, that was at the top of the college radio hot 100 chart for a record 9 straight weeks.

Miami Flames:
While their less popular brother team battles it out in the NBA Finals, the Flames are looking to improve upon last season's 2 win season. Rookie point guard Dataneesha McBride-Johnson will look to push the pace just like she did for East Nevada State last year.

Stay tuned for the Western Conference preview never!


  1. I'm not sure how you can write something about the WNBA and leave out any mention of my beloved NY Liberty.

  2. The WNBA still exists?

  3. This post was funny because it's so believable. I thought maybe they really had a coach named Rick Shroeder (just not the actor).

    A record of 15 straight double-doubles and a team selling out 10 of their last 20 games (although not in a high school gym) seems realistic.

  4. 15 straight triple doubles is kinda crazy.

  5. I thought you said double-doubles.

    Either way, who the hell knows what goes on in WNBA games since no one watches them. They could be playing naked.