Monday, October 24, 2011

PTU Keeping it Real Hall of Fame: Delonte West

This is a long time coming. Everyone's favorite motherfucker is the Andre Dawson of the PTU keeping it real Hall of Fame, passed up by the likes of inferior real keepers like Rafer Alston and Miguel Cabrera. Today, though, he will get his just due as the realest dude in all of sports. What makes that skinny, tattoo covered ginger the poster boy for keeping it 100? Let's take a look at his highlight reel:
  • Possibly banged his teammate's mother (which is usually very uncool) but that teammate was LeBron James (awesome)
  • Was arrested with all types of weaponry on a motorcycle (including a sword and guns in guitar cases Desperado style)
  • Blamed that arrest on Vicodin
  • Applied at a Home Depot during the lockout
  • Applied (and worked) at a furniture store during the lockout
  • Purchased a White '94 Ford Bronco to get his OJ Simpson on
  • Broke down in the middle of the road while driving said Bronco home and had to push it through the streets

This is just a small sample of the oeuvre of Delonte "keep it real" West. In fact, most people are ignorant to the fact that Delonte is actually an African phrase meaning "Keepin it real motherfucker" and never has there been a person more aptly named. His use of the phrase "OJ Style" is enough to earn him a spot in the PTUKIRHOF, but his continually awesome yet befuddling behavior is what cements his place in the immortal halls. Keep on fighting the power, Delonte.

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