Negro Please.

Loudmouth gasbag Stephen A. Smith, the human equivalent of a root canal, set off a minor Twitter controversy this morning when he let an "n word" slip on  air during a "debate" on televised train wreck First Take. This is not a big deal. At all. However, some self-righteous media analysts such as Jason McIntyre of The Big Lead and fat piece of crap Jason Whitlock are trying to turn this into an example of ESPN protecting one of their most popular (albeit inexplicably popular) employees. McIntyre (and others) have compared this to ESPN's handling of the Jeremy Lin "chink in the armor" controversy during the last NBA season. The stark difference between that instance and what Stephen A. said is the possibility of racism. There's no way in a million years that you could suggest Smith saying "nigga please" to another black man while talking about Kobe Bryant could be construed as racist. If Skip Bayless had said to this same guy "nigga please" or "I'm sorry, nigger, you don't know what you're talking about", this would be both unsurprising and grounds for firing. I have no doubt that Bayless refers to LeBron as "that N word" as soon as the cameras are off. Stephen A. is not Skip Bayless. He's a black man who often speaks in colloquial terms on the radio and television. That a "nigga please" might slip while he's on television is neither surprising nor offensive. If the word "nigga" (note the lack of an "er") is that offensive to you, you have definitely not spent any time around actual black or hispanic people. As much as White people and conservative critics like to complain about this being a double standard, I'm sorry but that's just one thing you will have to deal with. The "Chink in the armor" headline, while easily explained away as an innocuous turn of phrase that has been used hundreds of times in ESPN headlines, can also without a doubt be construed as racist. Especially when taking into account the fact that nearly every ESPN headline deals in double entendre or pun. Those headlines aren't just taken out of thin air. An ESPN intern doesn't go into the "headline" folder in the database and choose the most appropriate one. Someone sat there, thought about the different aspects of that Knicks Hornets game in February at the height (or I guess peak) of Linsanity and decided to use the most popular racial slur for Chinese people. Let's take a look at today's front page ESPN.com headlines (and unlike some other times, I did not make these up):

Cardinals ink David Frees to a new contract: FREESE FRAME
A look back at David Stern's tenure as NBA commisioner: STERN REVIEW
Patriots Tight Ends Hernandez and Patrick Chung will miss Sunday's game: IN A TIGHT SPOT

See what I mean? Like most newspapers,  blogs and websites, puns and double meaning are common in headlines. Maybe the poor sap who got canned because of his poor choice of words really didn't mean anything by it (he was really sorry, and eventually went to lunch with Lin who forgave him), but the point is there's a chance that those words could've been construed as hateful. There is no chance at all that Stephen A. was trying to be hateful. If you think what he said is in itself offensive, that's fine, but it's equivalent to an anchor letting "fuck" slip on the air. Words are only as hurtful as their interpretations and intentions. If Jason Whitlock is that offended by this word, I wonder how he somehow got through the 5 times that he watched the Wire in it's enitrety without sobbing. (The man's Twitter avatar has been Omar for a while). This is the same guy who once blamed Soulja Boy in a roundabout way for an NFL player's murder. In a quest to seem unbiased against his own race (an anti Al Sharpton) he instead uses every chance he gets to criticize black people and their way of speaking. I'm the last person to ever defend Stephen A. Smith, ESPN or especially First Take, but people need to get off their high horses this time. If you want to talk about racism, let's not try to find some where there isn't any. Jason Whitlock? There's never been a more appropriate time to say "nigga, please".

M@D's Bi-Weekly "What hell is my team up to" Week 6

AFC EAST

Every team is in first, every team is in last.

New England:
 is doing some amazing things on offense, but if they can't hold leads it won't matter what they do.

New Jets:
Tebow is lining up at running back during practice, this will happen during their next game, TIMsanity will follow.

Bills:
Pipe dream

Miami Dolphins:
Come on don't be kidding your self.
AFC NORTH

Baltimore Ravens:
Old dudes are getting hurt left and right, Ray Lewis is hurt, its like losing a starting QB expect the AFC north to be more competitive

Cincinnati Bengals:
Bengal ball is not winning football, A.J. Green might be the best WR in the league in terms of potential
Pittsburgh Steelers:
Steelers are getting healthy , Ben is balling with a Hurting Ravens , expect them to catch up.

Cleveland Browns:
They might be getting a good college coach. Not much more to talk about the Browns


AFC SOUTH

Houston Texas:
5-1 they ran into an Angry Arron Rodgers , if your team has an elite QB you can beat them. Baltimore thinks they have one so lets what happens when they face the Ravens.

Indianapolis Colts:
If you lose to the Jets you can't make the playoffs

Jacksonville Jaguars & Tennessee Titans
 Tennessee has good music, Jacksonville has good weather. Not much to say on the football front.

AFC West

San Diego Chargers
Don't like this team fool you please! Don't like this team fool you please! Don't like this team fool you please! Don't like this team fool you please! Don't like this team fool you please! Don't like this team fool you please!
This team will break your heart every time.

Denver Broncos
Manning knows how to play football and more importantly QB they will win the division.

Oakland Raiders
What is Raider football? Does it involve winning? Somebody let me know.(No Change from Last week)

Kansas City Chiefs:
Kansas City Still has great Ribs. In fact here is a recipe for them.
http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/neelys/kansas-city-style-pork-ribs-recipe/index.html

NFC WEST

San Francisco  49ers

Still my Pick to be in the Super Bowl, if they don't face the Giants. When this team is clicking you can't stop them. 

Arizona Cardinals

Smoke and Mirrors. QB getting smashed, I wonder who the 3rd string is? Cus you will see him before the season is done.

Seattle Seahawks:

Their defense is good, but they still have a rookie at QB. He is will make mistakes so they have an outside shot at a wild card.

St. Louis Rams:

 Steven Jackson , hes playing better, hes playing not hurt, but no body beats father time. Enjoy him while you can , it will be the last year he is in St. Louis 

NFC SOUTH

Atlanta Falcons:

Your the only un-defeated team left , so I can't bash you too much. Win a playoff game, then I will believe 

Tampa Bay Bucs:

The Ship is sinking.....

Carolina Panthers:

Nothing exciting about this team.

New Orleans Saints:

Saints are still on track to win 4 games in my opinion 

NFC NORTH

Its all about the Chicago Bears and Packers, Lions and Vikings are pretenders .

NFC EAST

Philadelphia Eagles:

Trouble in paradise, Vick might not get hurt this season because he might be riding the bench

Dallas Cowboys:

 Romo, Jerry, its a circus, no need to see whats under the big top.

Washington Redskins

RGIII looks scary lets see how he handles the Giants.

NEW YORK GIANTS:

The NFC is for the Giants to take

Its a great season. See you in two weeks.

What To Watch Instead of The Yankees

What's that smell? Did someone leave that egg salad out? Did the dog get a turd caught in his fur again? Are we near Staten Island? In fact, it's none of those things (unless you're in Staten Island right now). That rancid stench that you can almost taste is the New York Yankees. Yes, the Bronx Bombers have been dropping bombs all right this postseason. Stink bombs, that is. I'm trying to say the Yankees have stunk up the joint this October. Putrid,  wet dog, broccoli fart, D train during rush hour in July stink. Unfortunately, there's still at least 2 more games to be played in this toilet bowl of a playoff run that you might feel like you have to watch, out of morbid curiosity if nothing else. Thankfully in this era of round the clock entertainment, there's some other options for you to watch Tuesday night instead.

Everybody Loves Raymond reruns on...pick a channel

If you've been to your parents' house in the past couple years you've no doubt noticed that the hijinks of Ray Romano, his kind of hot wife, and freakish looking cop brother are on the tv all the time. I mean, it's always on. The reruns are simultaneously shown on TBS (except for tonight), My 9, TV Land, Univision, MTV, and every other channel on your local cable provider. Sick of watching Curtis Granderson swing at balls in the dirt? Why not watch Peter Boyle and Doris Roberts as the wisecracking in-laws who you love to hate?


Watch Paint Dry

The best method of watching paint dry, I find, is to get a neutral color at your local Home Depot (a tope or beige works best). Get a nice coat on a blank wall you may have in your home (if not contact a friend who has a blank wall that you can borrow). Using clean, broad strokes paint a rectangular box on the aforementioned wall. Pull up a comfortable chair and watch until the paint is sufficiently dry. In the span of 7 runners left on base and 2 A-rod strikeouts you should have a dry, freshly painted tope wall.

Stare at a homeless man at the Port Authority

There's a lot of great things to be found in New York City, but nothing is in greater supply and more fun than homeless people. And their unofficial headquarters is the Port Authority in Times Square. It's also a common misconception that they don't like to be stared at for long periods of time. Instead of suffering through another smiling Nick Swisher fuck up in the outfield, grab a snack and head to the Port Authority and stare at a homeless guy. Get a really good glare, and if you feel extra adventurous walk up to him and poke him in the face. You should try to find the dirtiest homeless dude you can, preferably one who is not wearing pants.

The Second Presidential Debate

Fuck that shit.

So there you have it, you may feel like you have no other options but to watch the Yankees flail away at pitches out of the strike zone and bumble their way to another loss, but you actually have many options at your finger tips. I'm on my way to the Port Authority now, enjoy your Tuesdays.

Weekend Parlay and Teaser Time (Week 6)

Our Terrible Thursday Teaser came in yesterday…barely.  But a win is a win.  I like these games for a tease and a parlay this weekend.

Giants +6 (+16 in a teaser)

The 49ers are a good football team.  They take care of business at home, they beat up on teams they’re supposed to beat up, and they don’t shoot themselves in the foot.  I’m just not ready to label them the class of the NFC just yet. 

They’ve beaten the Packers by 8, the Lions by 8, the Jets by 34, and Buffalo by 42. None of those teams are playing very good football at the moment and having big time struggles on the offensive side of the ball.  Their lone loss comes from the hands of the Vikings who have a competent pass rush and have an offensive identity.  I’m sure San Fran will be up for the game, but the Giants will be too, and they are no push overs in these types of spots.  San Fran May get the win, but the Giants keep it close.

Falcons -9 (+1 in a teaser)

Anytime you get a chance to pick a good home team against Carson Palmer, don’t bother thinking twice about it.  This may be the game McFadden decides to go off.   However, the Raiders will have to deal with Palmer continuously over throwing one of the faster receiving corps in football.  The Raiders will also have to contend with White and Jones torching their miserable secondary.  I can’t see how the Falcons blow this one in the Dome.

Pats -3 (+7 in a teaser)

Anytime you get a chance to pick a competent coach against Pete Carroll, don’t bother thinking twice about it. Mike McCarthy, Juan Rivera, and Jason Garrett are not my idea of very good head coaches and the only wins on the Seattle schedule.  I understand the Hags play good defense and have a great home crowd.  But don’t be fooled.  This is a team that has a 4/4, 5/3, and 4/4 record at home in the past three seasons with the bad Cards and bad Rams factoring into those wins (those two teams look better this year).  The Pats are firing on all cylinders and love to pad the stats against lesser teams, and lesser coaches.  This is an easy win for the Brady/Belichick clan.

Side Note: I know McCarthy has a ring, but bad clock management, bad use of challenges, and bad play calling are all part of his game.  For example, it took him 2 quarters, an Aaron Rodgers pummeling, and 7 sacks before he decided to run the ball a little that Monday night.

Hater Jay’s Terrible Thursday Three Team Teaser

The NFL and NCAA have decided that Thursday nights provide a nice undercard to the weekend slate.  The bosses of these leagues sell it to the fans by saying it allows us to see teams and matchups we wouldn’t normally see in our local TV markets.  What the NFL and NCAA don’t seem to acknowledge is that the weekly lead ins are mostly one sided affairs and matchups the national market could care less about.

This Thursday, the NFL gives us Tennessee at Pittsburgh.  The NCAA sees that matchup and raises Arizona State at Colorado, UTEP at Tulsa, Western Kentucky at Troy, and a ton of shots of hot cheerleaders.  Aside from the latter, there isn't much of interest there.

Fortunately, there is gambling.  It’s the one thing that can make any sporting event bearable.   A way to really have some fun with this is the three team ten point teaser.  For those of you unfamiliar, in a three team teaser, you pick 3 lines and get 10 extra points.  The bet is 120 for 100, and you must win all three games to win your bet. For the purposes of a crap night of football, I'll play 30 for 25.

These always sound easy and seem like no brainers, but usually end up with a terrible loss on some crap garbage time TD or garbage time interception (that's my disclaimer).  My Terrible Tease for this Thursday is:

Steelers +4.5 – The current line is Steelers -5.5.  In a teaser you get 10, moving this line to Steelers +4.5.  The Steelers haven’t been sharp, but the Titans have been worse.   I get Tennessee is at home, but do you think they can steal a win, after a bad loss, and traveling (from Minnesota) on a short week, with an offense and defense that is a total mess?  Me neither.

Steelers/Titans Under 52.5 – The current line 42.5.  In a teaser it moves to 52.5.  The Titans are struggling on offense, they’re struggling on defense, and they have no time to fix any of these things.  I see the Steelers going up early and eating clock with Mendenhall and Redman getting a combined 30 plus touches.

Arizona St -12.5 – The current line 22.5.  In a teaser it moves to 12.5.  Colorado is just terrible.  The Sun Devils aren’t known to be road warriors, but it doesn’t matter when you’re playing a team that loses at home to the likes of Sacramento State and Colorado State and takes a 28 point beat down from UCLA that included 3 TD drives of over 80 yards.

Jay-z In Brooklyn: A Review

We're only a few weeks away from the NBA season, a season that will see the first professional basketball game played in Brooklyn. Before we can get to that, though, the shiny new arena in downtown BK has to be christened by hometown boy done good (and Nets minority owner) Jay-Z. I've seen Hov perform 4 times now and he usually follows a similar pattern. Opens up with a few of his hits, slows down with some of his early stuff and lesser known tracks, does a quick montage of a slew of his other hits and then closes with a few more hits. Basically, this guy has a lot of hits. So many that he usually doesn't even perform some of his biggest songs during a 90 minute concert yet nobody really notices. For example, last night he didn't do Niggas in Paris, Can I get A or Ain't No Nigga, arguably three of his most popular songs ever, but the setlist was still pretty stacked. This all speaks to Hov's longevity, something unheard of in the youth obsessed hip hop world, where a rap career is usually about half as long as a starting running back in the NFL's career. Just like Jeter is moving up on all types of lists by virtue of sticking around long enough and producing at a solid level, Jay's hung around long enough to become the elder statesman of rap. He's defiinitely lost a little off his fastball (to mix my baseball metaphors) and that point is only hammered home when he gets to the "Classics" portion of the show. Hearing Dead Presidents II and Can I Live right after his verse from Clique off Kanye's Cruel Summer album, you really see the rust on his flow. Nevertheless, this was an above average Jay-z show even if it could have benefitted from a guest appearance or two (Big Daddy Kane came out during Friday's opening show but was back at the retired rapper's home on this night I guess). As always, the best moment for me is the last 30 or so seconds of You Don't Know off The Blueprint where Jay holds up the Roc symbol as Just Blaze's screaming sample blasts away. Usually flames and other such pyrotechnics accompany this moment, but this was a mostly special effects free evening, aside from the occasional lasers. Contrast this to last year's Watch The Throne tour which featured (among other spectacles) a 30 foot pillar with sharks superimposed on it, giant images of snarling dogs, smoke, lasers, flames and Kanye in a leather skirt. That's definitely more Kanye's lane, Jay's far less flamboyant, and is really the only rapper (one of the few performing artists in pop music at all, really) who can hold down a full 90 minute set by himself (not even Memphis Bleek made a cameo).

As for the arena itself it's largely what I expected. It's a sleek, hip new-school arena full of the finest foods and amenities. Basically the polar opposite of the Nets last homes in East Rutherford and Newark. The Nets are doing their darndest to erase any existence of their past life from the books. It's kind of like Rick Ross's pre-rap Corrections officer career. The Smoking Gun should be posting pics of Derrick Coleman and Yinka Dare any day now, "STARTLING PHOTOS OF BK NETS' UN-HIP YEARS IN NEW JERSEY". You can't really blame them, no one likes to dwell on their ugly past, especially when it's as butt ugly as the Nets' is. And the Barclay's Center is step one in their rehabilitation from the Knicks ugly step sister to kinda hot new girl on the block that no one is too sure about yet. Everything from the weird rusty exterior to the many hipster favorite restaurants inside is carefully calculated to shed that loser image. And the food choices are the best I've seen in a sports venue of any kind. It's a veritable who's who of "places people take their visiting relatives to eat when they visit Brooklyn". There's Bottle's favorite Mexican joint in Park Slope Calexico, Bensonhurst Guido mainstay L&B's pizza and even hipster haven Fatty Cue. Of course most of these places aren't that hip anymore, simply by virtue of being in a giant corporate arena, but it's still a big step up from shitty chicken fingers at Continental Airlines Arena or even anything served up at MSG. One surprise is the paltry snooty beer selection. I've heard that Six Point and BK brewery brewed beer is available somewhere but all I could find was Bud and Coors Light (which is fine with me, I don't go to a ball game to be a beer snob but it's still a little odd). Overall, though, Barclay's Center seems to be what it set out to be, a cool place to watch an event. And although I might not be able to root for any team still called the Nets, I felt a little bit of borough pride walking around the arena, seeing people wearing team merchandise with BROOKLYN in big letters across it.

M@D's Bi-Weekly "What hell is my team up to"

If I had a power ranking system, you can guess who I think is the best team in the league right now.

AFC EAST

NY Jets:
"WE BLOW WE BLOW" Wait that's not what they are chanting in the stadium? They want Tebow? Well surprise, surprise. They have done nothing to improve themselves and they lost KEY CB and KEY WR . Unless Tebow is truly the son of some deity , expect the Jets to have a top 3 pick, which they will use to draft a tight end lol.

New England Pats:
Use to be a "lock" Team now you have to ride the Brady coaster every week, Brady use to make any receiver look like a top 10 talent, now its beginning to be like a circus, expect ring leader Bill to shake things up and fix the course.

Miami Dolphins:
This team still stinks and I still question Reggie Bushes ability to finish the season. Nothing has been done to change my opinion.

Buffalo Bills:
Bills have issues at Running Back, no one ca hold onto the ball or stay healthy. The success of the Bills passing attack is based on you respecting the run, "No Run? No FUN!"

AFC NORTH

Baltimore Ravens:
No changes from last week, Flaco is magic at INTs and the defense is still good, they can win the division.

Cincinnati Bengals:
Bengal ball is a fun thing to watch, A.J. Green knows how to play.
Pittsburgh Steelers:
Ben and the Steelers are coming off a bye week, I expect them to defeat philly easy.

Cleveland Browns:
Browns are approaching Kansas City levels of being bad, but they are not known for their ribs. Their young QB showed flashes of maybe getting it done, but his receivers don't hold onto the ball.

AFC SOUTH

Houston Texas:
4-0 they beat up on bad teams not really rested yet, other then beating up on the Broncos. Expect them to beat the NY Jets easily

Indianapolis Colts:
Andrew Luck not so bad, keeps the team in the game, not too many rookie mistakes, with some weapons around him could be playoff bound in two years.

Jacksonville Jaguars & Tennessee Titans
 No playoffs no hopes for these teams at the moment. Titans should be 0-4 is not from miscues by the Lions

AFC West

San Diego Chargers
Don't like this team fool you please. The Saints will show how bad this team is Sunday Night.

Denver Broncos
Manning and the Broncos have really started to figure each other out. They will surpass SD Chargers.

Oakland Raiders
What is Raider football? Does it involve winning? Somebody let me know.

Kansas City Chiefs:
Kansas City Still has great Ribs

NFC WEST

San Francisco  49ers

Still my Pick to be in the Super Bowl, when they are motivated you see what they can do. 

Arizona Cardinals

Less Smoke & Mirrors and more better QB and Defensive play is what has made this team un-defeated, believe it or not tonight's game against the Rams is a test.

Seattle Seahawks:

Hey this team brought the refs back.

St. Louis Rams:

I wish someone would loop back Steven Jackson , I miss you. You use to be given the rock 30 times a game and just run wild. Now every shot of you is on the sideline with a ice pack on some part of your body. 

NFC SOUTH

Atlanta Falcons:

Good at home, so so on the road, sucky in the playoffs, finish how ever you want, no real future here.(Not changing this from last week)

Tampa Bay Bucs:

The Ship is sinking.....

Carolina Panthers:

Hey Cam Newton plays on this team, YAWN!!!! He is no longer Special, yes he is part the mold of young , fast, expanding the pocket QBS, but this type of QB will be hard pressed to win anything other then a division in the next few years, as other personal has not caught to their abilities. Another high first round pick for the Panthers coming up(Not changing this from last week)

New Orleans Saints:

I told you two weeks ago, this team needs his head coach more then you thought, but I know football and you will too if you keep reading my articles. ;) By the way, Drew has a chance to break a record that basically stood forever and against the SD Chargers its a lock. Read more about Johnny Unitas here http://www.johnnyunitas.com/about-unitas

NFC NORTH

Its all about the Chicago Bears, that defense is finally fully healthy and good.

NFC EAST

Philadelphia Eagles:

M. Vick is due for an injury, they should get blown out by Pittsburgh this week.

Dallas Cowboys:

 Romo, HA HA HA, HA, HA,(one for every INT thrown last Monday night) 

Washington Redskins

Guys hurt everywhere, RGIII still exciting.

NEW YORK GIANTS:

If the Giants lose the browns, you know what that means? Nothing! When they fail to make the playoffs, then I'll worry.

Its a great season. See you in two weeks.